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Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
How are you, Fred?
What? How?
Me trying to flirt What do you squat?
- Come on, let's go, baby. it's time to go. - Oh, screw you!
Why not?
Join me down at the river. We'll listen to some tunes and suck down a few beers.
That sneeze helped.
That woman is my life
All right, it's about time I take the governor off this beyotch!
Look at this fucking thing.
Can you move a little to the right, please. Nevermind, can u two just switch spots please?
So come on. Just be honest. What were you trying to accomplish?
Yeah. I think you should Photoshop all of them out. Come on.
I can tell you the exact day and hour that I lost mine.
- Yeah. - Well, that night Rick and I were gonna...
I did some recon. She's from Australia.
That is attractive.
How do I know if she'll come home with me?
Oh, it's a friend of my dad. Baseball player.
Why not?
All right
- No, no! No. Ooh. - Hey! Oh!
It was for me.
Yeah. It wasn't like I was trying to hide it. I mean, you know.
Thank you. it's nice finally to meet a woman who's not obsessed with penis size.
I wish I could throw up. I know it would help.
No, I love you more.
You're thinking of Snow Dogs, the kiddie flick.
Quiet little voices
I like my bongos with a little mileage on them, like Britney's.
- Follow me, fellas, for some ass. - Good. Okay. I like it.
Iced coffee, two Splendas.
Come on, why can't we have some fun? God knows our guys are living it up.
- I honestly don't know. - Ballpark, please.
Every time I wake up, I think a plane's going down.
She's taken my order before and it's--
...but, uh, you know what?
Missy sure is looking chipper for someone going through a divorce.
We let down the male species, you know that?
Either that or she's buying her T-shirts at Baby Gap.
So did you, um, go to Harvard?
You want a massage?
They're just kids in here. I don't see how they afford these prices.
That guy's single, he's loaded. Chicks love him.
What is your number?
Where the big-mouth vaginae Feel strange
Hear me out, gentlemen. I can explain every-- Uh. Uh.
Well, you didn't give him a free pass for nothing.
Oh, hell, no!
Oh. Here he comes.
If you recall, we had to make a couple of fairly substantial expenditures. Remember?
...it's probably because I kind of was.
I'm not telling you that. I gave him the freedom to choose for himself.
Hey, guys, I need to take a poo.
- He's a good guy. - He is a nice guy.
That's why this dude 's wearing the hat.
We're here to tighten it up for you.
Yeah, shoot.
So shape up. Good day, sir.
- Can I help you? - You must be Rick.
I think it would be good for us to go out one night a week...
I was 250 out. Had to get over some water. I gave it my all.
Moron, this is my car!
Where there's tits, and we look at them, and we smoke cigars.
You think Maggie might have a brain tumor or something?
I went to clean the house today, but nobody has been there...
...or is it gonna be somebody he met that day or Missy Frankinopoulos?
Yeah, I work out at home but thinking about taking my workouts public.
Look at Maggie, all right?
You know what, Rick? This is spring break.
You cheap bastard.
Yeah. Yeah.
I
Hold it!
Leigh?
Quiet words of wisdom
You could do anything you want. The wife will never find out.
- That's it. You two are dead men. - Whoa! He's got a gun!
What's that?
No.
I'll see you, Jorge.
Uh, yeah. I was thinking that you were gone.
- Okay, pull over, man. - No way. I can outrun them.
Hello?
Oh, my God. Oh, my God. What did they say? Is Grace gonna be okay?
I'm kidding. Fred Searing. Can I buy you a drink?
Is, uh, everything okay?
Very Disappointed, Gentlemen. Very Disappointed
What are you, an asshole?
I'm joking.
...doesn't mean you have to go around screwing my family.
- Agreed. - But you know who does?
- Take it easy, buddy. - I won't take it easy!
I gotta get going.
- For what? - For what?
I don't know.
Hey, don't go shooting the messenger now.
Hola.
What?
Ah.
- Over 20 years if you include dating. - Whoa.
Huh?
This poor kid is spending his hard-earned money on me. it's sad.
Even if she stayed, you wouldn't want her.
Always pushing up the hill Searching for the thrill of it
TRUMP 2020
- No! - What?
Hey, what the hell?
And this photograph is of me in high school.
Tonight's the night we'll make history
Hog-Head McCormick said 7500.
No, no. Okay, okay! Aah.
What?
How much would you be willing to spend for a weekend of erotic pleasures...
Oh, my God. You poor thing.
- Think your mother would give the recipe? - Gary! What are you doing?
You think that you can come into my club...
- Hello. - Hi.
- Mm. Okay. I'm in. Ha, ha. - Ah.
Thank you.
Huh? PAIGE & MEG Aah!
Thank you.
...so remind me again, who are we married to?
Making out with him is just so intimate, isn't it?
No, no
...and he waits for the girl to pass...
Yours most truly, Gerald Ahem.
Oh. Wow.
And when they asked me if I wanted to go with them, I said, Sure.
We'll get there, we'll get there.
...I was talking to Judy on the drug hotline most of last night.
I would be willing to pay 250 of your American dollars.
Coakley.
You can't help if her butt walks where you're looking.
What kind of soap do you use?
That girl over there is looking at you.
- But of course. But of course. - Four 9s.
I like being able to get in there and smoosh them...
You spot her from 15 feet away, turn, then wait for her to walk into your line of vision.
I'm just gonna have to go set him straight.
- What the hell is he doing? - Uh-oh.
What? No. No, no, no.
You're Awesome At Sex
- it's because of the way guys are wired. - Oh, come on. Give me a break.